to you

from the start there were secrets that you've kept from me
from the start you made your web of lies
you had me fooled from the start
what an amazing actor you are
a round of applause and a toast

nothing going on my ass
hmm you love me BULLSHIT
if you did you would have never kept the secrets
never hide past relationships
never lied continuously
no more secrets

would you at least wait a couple weeks before going back to your ex
who was annoying you or so you say
you don't want to hurt me
don't make me laugh

you obviously don't know the people that surround me
or me
you think you'd get away with it?
ha far from it
even if i do stop people from beating you to a plup
karma is gonna kick the living shit out of you

am i mad? that's hardly the word for it
do i hate you? i can hate you as much as i loved you
at least for me i really meant it when i said those three words
like an actor bravo for the very well rehearsed meaningless lies you fed me

how many times have you lied to me
cheated
you really haven't changed
i went against my own mind because i cared about you
i believed you

are you worth all the tears i have cried
you didn't want to hurt me huh
it seems like that was you intent all along
one time after another your bullet wounds went deeper
yet i still held on
people telling me you weren't worth it
i ignored their advice
i guess i was the stupid one

there is mixed feelings in me
sadness betrayal anger
i wonder what you're feeling right now
i know it's not regret nor is it sorrow

honestly you never did love me
i told you from the start not to say it if you didn't mean it
but you play your cards oh so well
not one feeling of guilt past through you
not the time were you lied when you told me you haven't had a girlfriend in a long time
not the time where you said you had nothing going on with her
not the time when you had sex with a different girl
not the time you said no more secrets when everything was a secret
not the time you said you were sorry
the list could go on and on

after the break up i knew i would still take you back
if it were to happen again
but now i can't even if my heart still throbs
i won't because i won't be able to be with you
without wondering if you're cheating
if you're lying
if you are saying those well rehearsed lines

you know the worst part of all this is
i love you[if only you actually were the person i thought you were]
i miss you [all the good times we had together]
i want you in my arms[the times i thought you actually meant what you said]

if i see you again i know i will i'm gonna want to punch you

yes an this time i'll be mad this time i won't try to hold back

i'm gonna want you pound your fucking face into the pavement and i won't want to stop until your heart stops beating

i'm gonna cry like i've never cried before

because when i think about it you never treated me like a girlfriend

at least not like how you treat her so i know you never loved me

because i would rather be tortured than go through the pain i'm in that you have caused

as i write this tears flow so easily as easily as your words

when i said i love you i meant it truly with all my heart

i really wonder why why why why you even asked me out

you could've said the next day oh sorry i didn't mean it

that would have been so much better

yet you dragged it on until i loved you