good evening one and all,
winter has reared it's head and i must admit it has been quite ugly. everyone has been stressing out about finals, research papers, and college deadlines. my stress levels have been off the charts not a good time to "try" to quit smoking, which i have failed miserably. cold turkey is quite an impossible task to do after two years of filling my lungs with the chemicals my mind craves it even as my body rejects it. But hopeully with winter break swinging around i'll be able to go out more, stay out more. don't count on it though as the night sky falls much faster now and my parent's paranoia continues to grow. i can't wait one more semester then i'm breaking free from these chains. of course there's always ways to fly under the radar which i will do soon. it's been awhile since i've let chemicals besides ones in bud, cigarettes, alcohol and cold medicines into my body. i think i'll plan a day for it and get suuuupppper whooo. hey i deserve indulgence once in a while. i've been keeping clean for you don't you think i deserve a reward? hmm, i dislike this sneaking around to stay out i have to do it makes me nervous but i want my freedom once in awhile. this week and next week then i'm good i'll be fairly good until i grad. Then watch me progress through my life with out your opinions weighing me down. i bet i'll learn more about life's do's and don't's by myself faster i'll learn about life friends love well without your help. anyway the story of my life right now is second choice. how wonderful it sounds right? ahaha barely but i'm getting over it. come on now life is too short to be holding long grudges plus there're WAY more and better opportunities. yessuh! of course things get me down in fact some things get me way down so deep in the blue it's hard for anyone to pull me out. people go through phases like that, they drift in and out. right now i suppose i am pretty content besides the fact i'm missing TLK very much i haven't seen them in a while now and i honestly really really miss them. so i hope i will be able to see them soon with it being winter break and all. OH! i turned in college apps and it was turned in with a personal college essay. remember that college essay i wrote in junior year? i revised it and turned it in. i believe it's one of the best papers i've written one that can really tell what i cherish in my life. ahh, with all that done turned in and awaiting for reviewing i feel so relieved. two more finals, one of which is slam poetry with my english class, that one will be a breeze. hope all goes well in my math final, it's tomorrow first thing in the morning so wish me luck~.

BON CHANCE everyone on finals and what not <3~!